The poor girl. She just needs some juice.

Poor, poor Avery is suffering from a mucus inducing, lung infesting, nasal congesting, head pounding plague of death commonly known as a sinus infection. She hoped to alleviate her misery with the long-sought after book meme. Alas, day after miserable day passed by, and still, she failed to earn the honor of the oh-so-coveted tag. Finally, willing to wait not one minute more, she DEMANDED she be given the tag which had so cruelly passed her by time and again. (And what a tag it was!) With the tag firmly secured, she scoured her personal library for a suitably taudry and titillating novel. She rifled through book after book in a desperate attempt to give the book meme a steamy, Harlequinesque flavor.

God, I love this woman! She’s a girl after my own heart.

With the passion of a sailor who has been at sea for too many months, she ravaged her book collection for the perfect blend of aphrodisia and eroticism. The hours passed and the sun began its descent as our poor Avery wilted under the weight of her defeat. For sadly, page 123 of each and every piece of chick lit in her possession told nothing but tales of tax accounting and other such mundane and non-arousing activities. (I don’t know… unless you ARE a tax accountant and you find that arousing, more power to you.)

But Avery knew that even though her library of page 123s had failed to live up to her stimulating expectations, her dream might not die. For she has loyal and avid readers whose only wishes are to see her satisfied (and mucus-free.) And so she extended the tag and bid us go forth in her quest for erotica.

Well, maybe not, but I took it that way.

It must have been fate, for my current book is proving to be quite juicy. Mercy by Jodi Picoult, offered just this bit of prurience:

He had heard the doorbell, had known it was Mia and tried to stuff the information into the back recesses of his mind. When Allie told him that she had invited Mia for dinner, he’d felt the blood rush from his head. He could not imagine anything more uncomfortable than sitting across a table from both his wife and the woman he could not stop thinking about.

Ok, I may have built up those three sentences just a little much, but I assure you, Avery, there is an abundance of lust just a few pages down the road… Trust me. He does much more than just think about Mia, such as….

Oh, wait. This is kind of a family friendly blog. I’m going to have to censor just a bit here…

When he was (censored) in front of her, Mia reached out to touch his (censored.)

She ran her hands down his chest and stomach to (censored, censored, censored, censored) and felt him (censored.)

Cam knew he could not hold on so he buried his face against her neck and, in the strongest effort of will he had yet to face in his life, (censored censored censored censored) and crushed her against him.

Ummm… I need to finish up here and uh…. go read the rest of my book! Right.

I’m supposed to tag 5 people, but I already did so, I’ll just leave this open to anyone else who cares to interpret this meme in any twisted way they please. Here’s how it works:

The rules :
1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people & post a comment here once you post it to your blog, so I can come see.

For added fun, bend and twist all the rules!!! Be a rebel, for Avery’s sake!

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14 thoughts on “The poor girl. She just needs some juice.

  1. I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you.

    Mike Harmon

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  2. Whew! Is it getting a little warm in here?!

    I must say, you are awesome! Shelf after shelf of tawdry books, and not one–NOT ONE–was half as steamy on page 123 as yours. I mean, I know they’re formulaic, but seriously?!

    Thanks so much for playing along! I bow to you! ;o)

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  3. “When he was (eating) in front of her, Mia reached out to touch his (quesadilla.)

    She ran her hands down his chest and stomach to (see how bloated he was from over-eating) and felt him (break wind.)

    Cam knew he could not hold on so he buried his face against her neck and, in the strongest effort of will he had yet to face in his life, (tried in vain to stop himself vomitting) and crushed her against him.”

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  4. But God said to them, “Do not go with them. You must not put a curse on those people, because they are blessed.”
    The next morning Balaam got up and said to Balak’s princes, “Go back to your own country, for the Lord has refused to let me go with you.”

    The closest book was a Bible … kind of disappointing huh?

    ~Jef

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  5. First you offer me a massage…:)))) now erotic passages..

    Today is a very good day…whoohoo….:)))))))..I have to admit when I did this meme I was going to borow the Victoria Secret catalogue and post the pictures but I didn’t..now I think I shoulda….:)))

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