Every once in a while I have one of those days. I had one today. Everything just felt icky. The morning sky was heavy and the air felt dark. The full moon that had been visible in the morning sky the last couple of days was barely visible behind a thick layer of clouds.
I don’t know if it’s the fact that the holidays are over and there’s a long stretch of winter ahead. I don’t know if it’s just too much of the gray landscape. Maybe I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed with trying to take care of my parents while still dealing with everyday life. I don’t know. I just know that sometimes nothing feels right. In rush hour traffic, other drivers annoy me. I can’t find my smile and the minutes of the day drag by interminably.
That’s what today was like. I was one big heap of crabby-pants.
After work, I delivered dinner to my parents, then came home to eat with my family. I didn’t feel like talking and sort of moped through dinner. Kacey and Connor had been hinting since yesterday that we should all go bowling. As we ate dinner, the question came up. “Are we going to bowl tonight?”
Mark was willing and asked if I wanted to go. I said that I did, hoping that my bad attitude wasn’t entirely obvious behind my words. Because truthfully? I really would rather have just crawled under a blanket and buried my head for the night.
But I went bowling. And I didn’t bowl all that well, but I couldn’t help but find a few smiles and some laughter as I hung out with Mark and the two goofballs. Kacey and Connor have so much fun together, it’s hard not to get sucked into the merriment. I felt a little better, but a part of me wanted to hang onto the self-pity I’d been feeling all day.
Just as we finished our games, I saw a familiar face making her way over to where we were standing.
It was Kendra, my long-lost and recently found again high school best friend. We’ve stayed in touch since we found one another on Facebook a couple of years ago, but Kendra lives a good forty-five minutes away from me so we don’t see each other or even talk all that often.
Gosh, it was good to see her. She hugged me, then sat down and we just picked up talking as if we were continuing a conversation that had been going on for hours. That’s the great thing about real, deep-down true friends. No matter how much time has passed, you can just pick right up again. Mark and the kids, sensing that this might take a while, made their way into the arcade and entertained themselves with shoot ‘em up games and such. They gave us some time and some space.
Our lives are so similar, Kendra’s and mine. Oh, there are drastic differences too, but the stuff that we’re dealing with is all so much the same. The parent stuff and the family stuff. Work stuff. Life stuff. It felt so good to know that she’s dealing with these things too and she gets it. It felt good to know that in many ways, she is in the same boat as I am. And that knowledge didn’t miraculously fix anything. It was just nice to realize that I’m not alone.
It was just so good to see my friend.