Just What I Needed

Every once in a while I have one of those days. I had one today. Everything just felt icky. The morning sky was heavy and the air felt dark. The full moon that had been visible in the morning sky the last couple of days was barely visible behind a thick layer of clouds.

I don’t know if it’s the fact that the holidays are over and there’s a long stretch of winter ahead. I don’t know if it’s just too much of the gray landscape. Maybe I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed with trying to take care of my parents while still dealing with everyday life. I don’t know. I just know that sometimes nothing feels right. In rush hour traffic, other drivers annoy me. I can’t find my smile and the minutes of the day drag by interminably.

That’s what today was like. I was one big heap of crabby-pants.

After work, I delivered dinner to my parents, then came home to eat with my family. I didn’t feel like talking and sort of moped through dinner. Kacey and Connor had been hinting since yesterday that we should all go bowling. As we ate dinner, the question came up. “Are we going to bowl tonight?”

Mark was willing and asked if I wanted to go. I said that I did, hoping that my bad attitude wasn’t entirely obvious behind my words. Because truthfully? I really would rather have just crawled under a blanket and buried my head for the night.

But I went bowling. And I didn’t bowl all that well, but I couldn’t help but find a few smiles and some laughter as I hung out with Mark and the two goofballs. Kacey and Connor have so much fun together, it’s hard not to get sucked into the merriment. I felt a little better, but a part of me wanted to hang onto the self-pity I’d been feeling all day.

Just as we finished our games, I saw a familiar face making her way over to where we were standing.

It was Kendra, my long-lost and recently found again high school best friend. We’ve stayed in touch since we found one another on Facebook a couple of years ago, but Kendra lives a good forty-five minutes away from me so we don’t see each other or even talk all that often.

Gosh, it was good to see her. She hugged me, then sat down and we just picked up talking as if we were continuing a conversation that had been going on for hours. That’s the great thing about real, deep-down true friends. No matter how much time has passed, you can just pick right up again. Mark and the kids, sensing that this might take a while, made their way into the arcade and entertained themselves with shoot ’em up games and such. They gave us some time and some space.

Our lives are so similar, Kendra’s and mine. Oh, there are drastic differences too, but the stuff that we’re dealing with is all so much the same. The parent stuff and the family stuff. Work stuff. Life stuff. It felt so good to know that she’s dealing with these things too and she gets it. It felt good to know that in many ways, she is in the same boat as I am. And that knowledge didn’t miraculously fix anything. It was just nice to realize that I’m not alone.

It was just so good to see my friend.

23 thoughts on “Just What I Needed

  1. There’s nothing like having a TRUE friend that gets you. Glad you were feeling better. A bit of advice, though…when I get down like that, I try to make the time to ask God to lift my spirits and take the gloominess away. He usually does :D God bless…


  2. Sometimes the hug of a true friend is all we need to break the wall that is separating us from the ‘outer world’. Just to come home in someone else’s thoughts and understanding.
    I’m so glad you met Kendra that evening, and that your family gave you the space you needed.
    Friendship is the best!!!


  3. I am glad that the others were able to drag you out from under the heap of crappy pants!

    Sometimes it just gets you like that – you just sit there and think “Ugh, really?”

    This reminds me that I have a whole bunch of friends that I really must track down again – I am starting to feel like a hermit!


  4. …. Good on Mark and the kids for getting you out and even better to have an understanding friend “happen” by.

    A quote I love is, “Coincidences are just God’s way of remaining anonymous …”

    Feel better soon


  5. I’m glad that you chose Option “B” and drug your crappy pants out to go bowling with the family. Winter seems to be settling in and we have the same family issues, so we can relate to those crappy days. Life always seems to throw you a curve or two and sometimes it turns out to be a pleasant surprise. It’s good to have friends like Kendra.


  6. You know your a heap of craBBy pants when you have to be talked into going bowling. :) I’m so glad you did, and that it turned out so well. For the record, I’m wearing my own set of crabby pants. And although I’d rather stay home tonight and not get out in the cold to go bowling, I will now force myself to go… and most likely, once I get with the girls, I will have a good time and be glad I went. Hope Thursday is a better day for you!


  7. Glad you had the encounter with Kendra and have been able to reconnect.

    I am told that I live in an area that rivals Seattle for number of gray days. No wonder I wear a frown so much–looking out at another gray day.


  8. I read “Alexander & The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day” to the boy yesterday. He was laughing at the pictures. I was shaking my head like “Dude, tell me about it”. Sorry you had a funky day. Hope your Thursday makes up for it :)


  9. Glad you decided to go. Good things happen at bowling alleys, I find. And who wouldn’t want to hang out with “Mark and the two goofballs”?

    We all have our craBBy days, and you’ve been pretty overwhelmed with negative “stuff” lately. Don’t feel down about feeling down. Happy Pants will return!


  10. Now aren’t you glad you went bowling?? It’s easy to get down when life’s pressures weigh in on us; only a true friend — one who’s been there, done that — can appreciate what we’re going through and empathize with our struggles. And that’s a priceless gift!


  11. You know it’s just the way things are. Some days, even for no good reason, you feel out of sorts – things don’t go right – you’re making stupid mistakes. And you know it’s going to be “one of those” days. And then something serendipitous comes along like the bowling thing or your friend and things turn around. Just the way it is.


  12. I’ve been thinking when I read your posts over the past week that you had a lot on your plate. I was surprised you weren’t beginning to wear down–as I know I would. So your response it totally normal. Plus, if I recall correctly, this happens to you at this time of the year. You get the winder blues, don’t you. This will get better, my friend. I promise–I so, so promise!


  13. Sorry things are so tough right now. I wish I could say something more moving than that, but I haven’t been there so I don’t know. What I do know is, you’re a strong and determined woman and you will get through this stuff. And if your mom is anything like you, she will get through it too.

    Meanwhile, I’m glad you went bowling and it helped lift your spirits, and I’m glad you ran into Kendra and realized you’re not alone!


  14. It’s nice that the day left you in a much happier place than you thought! Good for you!! 35 minutes isn’t that far either….if you meet halfway, it’s a 20 minute trip. Heck, I can’t get ANYWHERE in under 20 minutes.


  15. I have days like that sometimes, and I must admit that I bunker down at the end of the day. Kudos for you making yourself get out. I need to do that kind of thing more, because who knows what kind of joy I’m depriving myself of by not doing so!


  16. Good friends always make a day better. Yesterday, I had an incredibly frustrating day at work. Afterward, my buddy, Jonny, called me and asked if I wanted to meet him at Buffalo Wild Wings for some drinks and food. Even though we work together, he lives about 45 minutes away (kinda like Kendra), so we don’t really get to hang out outside of work very often anymore. It was good to sit down and talk about all the good times we’ve had and just relax.


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