The Problem with Purses

So I bought a new purse yesterday. I decided that my old purse was just too darn big. I bought the old one about six months ago and it was a little bigger than I normally like. But I wanted something big enough to hold my Nook e-reader as well as all of the other normal stuff. And it looked like this.

Etienne Aigner Handbag, A Logo Tote - HandbagsAnd it was big enough to hold my Nook. And my wallet. And my cheater glasses. And my sunglasses. And some hand sanitizer and lip balm and lipstick that I rarely use and some Ibuprofen and some Acetaminophen and some miscellaneous papers and about sixty pens  and a fingernail file and my cell phone and gum and the kitchen sink.

Google Images

Well,there really wasn’t a kitchen sink in my purse but I think I could have probably fit a small child in there if I tried hard enough. It looked quite similar to the one in the photo above. That sucker was heavy! Sometimes I’d have to switch shoulders because the weight of the bag was too much and became painful.

What is it with us women? Why do we have to carry so much stuff around with us? And I have learned that the bigger the purse, the more stuff you’ll put in there. When I was carrying my gargantuan purse, people came to know that if they were in need of something, they could ask me because it was a pretty good bet I had everything anyone could possibly need ever in my purse. Ever!

Last summer I was working on a project at work that required me to relocate to a conference room for a couple of months so I could work closely with the team. It got so that I hardly ever even went to my desk. I just went straight to the conference room each morning with my jacket, purse and all. Favorite IT Guy, Dale made an observation about the women in the group one day. He was absolutely fascinated with the amount of stuff we hauled to and from work each day in our purses. I remember entering the room just after the conversation had begun and he looked at me and pointed. With wide eyes and awe in his voice, he said, “You have two of them! Why do you have two purses?”

“I don’t have two purses,” I argued. “I have one purse and one tote bag.There is a difference.”

Dale was confused. “What do you need to carry in the tote bag that isn’t already in the purse?”

“My lunch,” I said. “And sometimes my breakfast, and magazines I might have a chance to read over lunch break, the charging cord for my Nook, ear buds, multi-vitamins…”

I could tell Dale had already checked out as I listed the contents of my bags. It was that day that I began to realize that Dale had a very good point. What is with all the stuff? I’m nearly breaking my back hauling around all of the stuff I just might need at some point, but 99% of the time I don’t. I mean really! What do I really use on a daily basis out of all that stuff in my purse? My keys, my check card, my cell phone and the lip balm. What’s the worst that can happen if I lighten the load? Is there going to be a hair emergency if I don’t keep that travel-size bottle of hair spray on me at all times? I doubt it.

So I bought a new purse. I made sure my Nook wouldn’t fit in it. The new purse would actually fit in the old purse! And I swore I was going to pare down the stuff to just the essentials. Oh yes, I was making great strides in gaining control of my purse again. I couldn’t wait to sit down last night and clean out the old one. I was ready to have a reasonable purse again with a reasonable amount of stuff inside. I carefully sorted through the contents of my purse. I threw a lot of stuff away and eliminated the non-essentials. There would be no non-essentials in the new purse.

Now that I’ve made the switch to the new purse, there’s only one problem… I can’t get the zipper closed.